


Dream

by carmenta



Series: In Hindsight [2]
Category: Vampire Chronicles - Rice
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2000-03-01
Updated: 2000-03-01
Packaged: 2017-10-08 02:34:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 776
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/71795
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/carmenta/pseuds/carmenta
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The counterpart to Regret, told from Daniel's point of view.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dream

He had not imagined that the silence between them could be so oppressing. The ability to communicate with others without speaking a word made it twice as hard to know that the one mind he would always seek to understand was locked to him. Irrevocably hidden behind a barrier too strong to ever breach, no matter how hard he tried.

For the first nights he had not even realized that it was there, so absorbed had he been in discovering the countless glittering facets of this new life that was so entirely different from all he had known. Different from what he had imagined. The tale of Louis, the talks with Armand had not prepared him for the despair and guilt he had felt at taking his first victim, that sweet runaway that had not been meant for death.

Since that night long gone he had come to accept his role, saw himself a part of nature as he picked those who wandered alone, silent predator that he was. It did not bother him to take life, no guilt wrecked his conscience. But it was a constant reminder that he had not been prepared at all for the world into which he had begged to come, that Armand had maybe been right in resisting for so long.

During those years on the run, Daniel had created his own image of Lestat's Savage Garden, beautiful yet lethal. His imagination had been running wild, conjuring ever more colorful and detailed dreams of what he was to become one night, when he had finally broken Armand's resistance.

Waking up to a new world had been more than overwhelming. Leave it to the others to describe what they had experienced during those first hours as a newborn, their tales were accurate for him. It had been difficult to adjust at first, and he had not had an easy start, considering the uproar and chaos at the time of his making. Still Daniel thought that he had done fairly well under those circumstances.

After the coven at the Night Island had dissolved, Daniel had wandered off on his own, planning to explore for himself what the world had to offer now. A week, longer had he not intended to stay away. But the week had become one month without him realizing it at all. Time passed at a different pace now, and he still had to learn to keep track with it.

Returning home, it had been nearly impossible to bear Armand's wary looks, the knowledge that his maker had been worried and that he was speculating about the reason for Daniel's absence now. Of course Daniel had attempted to explain, but he had seen Armand withdraw into himself while he spoke, and had given up, knowing that there lay no use in justifying himself.

It had happened again and again; Daniel would take off for a trip, and at his return he was met with the icy silence of Armand that only broke again after some nights had passed. It was hurting Armand, that much was plain. But Daniel needed his freedom, and Armand seemed to understand, even though he was not content at all.

Daniel's travels became longer and longer, until he woke one night to the realization that three years had passed since he had last got a glimpse of Armand's face, since he had heard that smooth voice. The decision that had prompted him to return to the Night Island and look for his maker had been spontaneous, as had been his reactions after discovering that Armand was not at their island home and had left no word of his whereabouts. He had traveled west, seeking out the counsel of Louis and Lestat, hoping that one of them knew where Armand could be found.

He had not found Armand when he had arrived there. Remembering who it had been to tell him of his maker's final attempt to find God was impossible. He had only realized nights later what it really meant that Armand had stepped into the sun. When he finally understood, he turned around and left the city, tracking down all his reckless travels during twelve years of trying to escape a beautiful, deadly boy. One by one he repeated them, going to all the places he had been, searching for memories. His mind refused to accept that Armand was gone, as Armand had probably refused to accept that Daniel was gone each time he had left for one of his little expeditions. The only difference was that Armand had always been able to hope for his return.

But he had left Daniel forever. Alone.


End file.
